A story about what happened when I changed how my brain stored love.
The Real Story
I didn’t get over my ex by blocking him, deleting pictures, getting a new boyfriend or waiting for time to “heal” me.
I got over him in about 20 minutes by changing the way my subconscious stored him.
I didn’t invent it. I just used it, first on myself, and then later with clients. It’s not magic; it’s about restructuring. When you change the way your mind codes a person, your emotions (and behaviors) naturally update.
Step 1: See What Your Subconscious Sees
When I thought of him, the image was right in front of me, close, to my right, bright, alive, like he was in the room with me. The image had its own gravitational pull.
My heart started beating fast. My body leaned forward. My mind softened into a dreamy kind of trance.
That’s how my subconscious marks someone as special, significant, still unfinished.
But the image and longing feelings weren’t proof of love. It was proof of memories and associations still attached to the past story/desire and unaware of the present.
Step 2: Find Someone Neutral
Next, I thought of a man I used to like but now feel totally neutral about.
The image was smaller, dimmer, and much farther away. To my left. It was black and white.
No pull. No ache. Just calm recognition.
That contrast was the lightbulb moment:
My brain wasn’t attached to my ex. It was attached to the structure that kept him “close.”
Step 3: Permission to Release
I asked myself,
“Would I have any objection to seeing him the same way I see that neutral person?”
Immediately, something in me relaxed.
I realized I wasn’t erasing him or denying the love we once had. I was simply allowing my nervous system to stop reacting as if he were special.
The lessons and memories would stay. The longing could go.
Step 4: Reorganize
I brought his image to mind again and slowly moved it in my imagination matching it to the same location, distance, size, and brightness as the neutral one.
As I did, I could literally feel something shift in my body. It was like unplugging an invisible cord.
He became human again. Not mythical. Not mine.
Just… a man I once knew.
Step 5: Keep the Value, Not the Hook
Once the charge was gone, I asked:
“What did I truly value in that relationship?”
Warmth. Humor. Playfulness. Affection. Connection.
I gathered those qualities into a symbol, a soft, glowing light, and placed it in front of me.
Then I imagined that same light multiplying into my future, scattering like small, golden stars ahead of me.
Each one carried the same essence, waiting to meet me in new forms.
When I thought of him again, the ache was gone. The desire was erased. He felt like a friend.
The gratitude stayed.
Why It Works
Your subconscious doesn’t store people in words. It stores them in pictures, sensations, emotions and associations.
Where they appear in your mental space, how bright or close they seem, even the tone of their imagined voice…all of it tells your nervous system how to feel, react and even behave!
When you alter those details, you change the emotional reality attached to them.
You’re not deleting a memory. You’re updating it so it fits who you are now. Today.
That’s why the shift feels instant. The mind updates the file.
And the best part? It’s permanent
What Changed
After that 20-minute process:
- I stopped checking my phone.
- The memory stopped feeling heavy.
- My body felt calm, grounded, and proud.
- I felt excited about dating someone new.
I didn’t have to “try” to move on.
My subconscious already had.
Acknowledgment
This process is adapted from the lineage of Steve & Connirae Andreas and other transformation methods.
My contribution is simply applying it to modern love, using subconscious updating/rewiring and identity-level work to help people experience emotional freedom that feels gentle, fast, and is 100% real.
I’ve also learned to use this to create more money, career, confidence and all other goal achievement.
Getting over someone isn’t an act of force of willpower.
It’s an act of clarity and updating.
When your subconscious realizes the story is complete, your body stops fighting for the past, you are back in full control and power and peace becomes your new normal.
FAQ (Let’s Keep It Real)
“Isn’t this just denial?”
No—it’s re-coding how your body stores a memory so you can choose clearly. You remember accurately; you’re simply not hooked.
“What if it comes back?”
Echoes happen. Re-run the installation for 1–2 minutes and re-test the cue. Each pass strengthens the new pathway.
“What if he was truly good for me?”
Great. Removing the hook doesn’t erase goodness; it restores discernment so you can choose from calm self-respect.
Want the free guide?
If you’re ready to finally stop looping on someone from your past,
I’ve created a simple step-by-step guide that walks you through the exact process I used to get over my ex in 20 minutes.
It’s gentle, fast, and surprisingly freeing.
👉 You can download it free here: Get the 7-Steps To Get Over Your Ex Guide
Tomorrow, I’ll be sharing a different version of this process.
The one I use when someone’s been betrayed, blindsided, or left without closure.
Because that kind of pain lives in the body differently…
and it requires a deeper kind of release.
Stay tuned.
NEXT STEPS & RESOURCES
What if men aren’t rejecting you — they’re just reflecting you?
Learn how your self-perception quietly teaches men how to treat you with The Mirror Effect Guide. Learn how your inner energy creates love, support, and devotion from men. Download the free guide HERE.
Your self-image sets the limit on what you attract and create. And when you change the image within, everything reflects differently. Download The Self-Image Reset Guide and discover how your past experiences quietly built your identity and how to transform those patterns so love, success, and confidence become your automatic new normal. Download The Self-Image Reset Guide for free.
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