Why It Happens And How To Stop

You’re avoiding eye contact 

Avoiding eye contact typically stems from feelings of nervousness or feeling uncomfortable. 

However, this behavior can be interpreted to mean you don’t want to engage  or interact with others. You can come off as mean, uninviting or uninterested. 

You fidget with your hair, small items or can’t sit still. 

Fidgeting is a response to anxiety or boredom. Anxious fidgeting occurs because the body has elevated levels of stress hormones, which are prepping your muscles for sudden exertion.

The behavior can be off-putting to others as it can cause an uneasiness in them.

You mumble or speak at a very low volume.

Soft-spokenness can have a physical explanation, however, often it’s due to feelings of shyness and a deeper fear of being seen & heard.

It inhibits communication, causes your vocal chords to grow weak and over time creates feelings of self-consciousness and shame.

You overuse words like literally, um and like.

Filler words are typically used to give you time to think. However, they’re usually misused and used too much.

This can convey a lack of vocabulary and not being prepared to share an idea, which can come across as being unintelligent & unprepared.

You walk or sit with a hunched posture.

A posture that causes you to round your back, face downward and even focus downward instead of straight forward can give off the impression of fear, ambivalence or shame. 

Conversely, when you walk, stand or sit with a strong upright posture, you present as very assertive and confident. Noble even. 

Self-confidence is created by you and felt by others.

Imagine being in a room of people where you’re standing tall, making eye contact and smiling at everyone you see, speaking powerfully yet calmly and knowing exactly what to say.

 How would you feel? 

How might others feel around you and about you?

Confidence in yourself makes others confident in you.

It begins with you.

When you feel strongly and speak clearly about an idea or opinion, others will trust your confidence. Focus on one of these behaviors weekly. Notice when you’re doing them and remind yourself to undo it.

Your physical behaviors say a lot about how you feel and could give off the wrong impression if you’re not aware. 

It’s important to recognize that your actions also activate feelings in other people. Physical actions convey emotions more than you think.