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Ep. #60 – Self Abandonment – What Is It?

I'm Anabell!

I’m a Trauma-Informed Coach who believes you’ve gotta heal your emotional wounds to create anything you want.

hey there

In this episode, I’m sharing tips the concept of Self Abandonment.  

I also explain how it’s created, what the effects are on your life and how to stop doing it.  

Important Terms:

Self abandonment – is when you disconnect from your highest Self.You abandon your needs, values, instincts, emotions, thoughts,behaviors, requests, intuition, goals, inner knowing, desires anddreams. It is learned behavior. It is automatic. You learned it from yourprimary caregivers, culture, family of origin, community. It is adetachment from Self. You learned it by seeing others self-abandonand/or you were told or taught that it isn’t good to be You. Maybe youwere punished for being you, expressing yourself, making a mistake,requesting something.

Self Leadership/Connection: 

Living from your values, needs, desires, goals, intuition, voice, innerknowing.

Self Accountability: 

Honoring your promises to yourself. 

Self protective behaviors: things you do automatically and by habit that arelearned from your caretakers….either by their example or by being told todeny your emotions, thoughts, beliefs, interests, behaviors, needs andrequests.

Hustling (Self Protective Behavior) – 

Over functioning, people pleasing, codependent, over-learning (alwaysreading to learn, listening to podcasts, taking course after course, takingtrainings, getting degrees and certifications), comparing, rationalize,doing, over thinking, working a lot, perfectionism. 

Hiding (Self Protective Behavior) – 

Numbing (ex. shopping, social media, porn, cheating (both emotionallyand physically, alcohol, weed, work, busyness), addiction, avoiding,ghosting others, under functioning, impulsiveness, settling for less thanyou deserve, procrastination, claiming indecision, hiding withoverworking, not applying what you learn, “not giving something 100%effort” or holding back. 

What you will discover:

  • Why self abandonment happens.
  • What creates self abandonment.
  • What Self Leadership is.
  • How Self Leadership helps heal your wounds.
  • What Self Abandonment does to you as a person.

Listen to the full episode here:

Enjoy the show?

Don’t miss an episode. Follow on Spotify and subscribe via Apple PodcastsStitcher or RSS.

Leave me a review in Apple Podcasts

READY TO HEAL? JOIN THE WAITLIST HERE TO WORK WITH ME VIA THE TRAUMA INFORMED COACH IN EARLY 2022

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BOOK OBSESSED, ENNEAGRAM 7, CHRONIC OVER-MANIFESTOR, NEUROSCIENCE NERD. 

Hi, I’m Anabell, Trauma-Informed Coach

I’m Sex And the City obsessed, Audible addicted (I love a great audiobook) and will talk your ear off about all things subconscious mind.  

With over 20 years worth of self-development books read under my belt, I should’ve known I was destined to be a Coach. But it wasn’t that straight of a road for your girl. 

The amount of times I quote rap music lyrics daily, you’d think I would be a creative, not a Coach. But I bring my creativity, ventral energy and Pisces vibe to my practice. We’re healing...it doesn’t need to be painful! 

Learn more

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Ep. #60 – Self Abandonment – What Is It?

In this episode, I’m sharing tips the concept of Self Abandonment.  

I also explain how it’s created, what the effects are on your life and how to stop doing it.  

Important Terms:

Self abandonment – is when you disconnect from your highest Self.You abandon your needs, values, instincts, emotions, thoughts,behaviors, requests, intuition, goals, inner knowing, desires anddreams. It is learned behavior. It is automatic. You learned it from yourprimary caregivers, culture, family of origin, community. It is adetachment from Self. You learned it by seeing others self-abandonand/or you were told or taught that it isn’t good to be You. Maybe youwere punished for being you, expressing yourself, making a mistake,requesting something.

Self Leadership/Connection: 

Living from your values, needs, desires, goals, intuition, voice, innerknowing.

Self Accountability: 

Honoring your promises to yourself. 

Self protective behaviors: things you do automatically and by habit that arelearned from your caretakers….either by their example or by being told todeny your emotions, thoughts, beliefs, interests, behaviors, needs andrequests.

Hustling (Self Protective Behavior) – 

Over functioning, people pleasing, codependent, over-learning (alwaysreading to learn, listening to podcasts, taking course after course, takingtrainings, getting degrees and certifications), comparing, rationalize,doing, over thinking, working a lot, perfectionism. 

Hiding (Self Protective Behavior) – 

Numbing (ex. shopping, social media, porn, cheating (both emotionallyand physically, alcohol, weed, work, busyness), addiction, avoiding,ghosting others, under functioning, impulsiveness, settling for less thanyou deserve, procrastination, claiming indecision, hiding withoverworking, not applying what you learn, “not giving something 100%effort” or holding back. 

What you will discover:

  • Why self abandonment happens.
  • What creates self abandonment.
  • What Self Leadership is.
  • How Self Leadership helps heal your wounds.
  • What Self Abandonment does to you as a person.

Listen to the full episode here:

Enjoy the show?

Don’t miss an episode. Follow on Spotify and subscribe via Apple PodcastsStitcher or RSS.

Leave me a review in Apple Podcasts

READY TO HEAL? JOIN THE WAITLIST HERE TO WORK WITH ME VIA THE TRAUMA INFORMED COACH IN EARLY 2022

anabell ingleton

I help Coaches learn a trauma-informed approach to their business, coaching and selling in my coaching program, Self Made.

@anabell.ingleton

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